


Death Wish

by indigorose50



Category: Fire Emblem: Fuukasetsugetsu | Fire Emblem: Three Houses
Genre: Enemies to Friends to Lovers, Feelings Realization, Fire Emblem: Three Houses Blue Lions Route Spoilers, Huddling For Warmth, M/M, Post-Blue Lions Route (Fire Emblem: Three Houses), Tumblr Prompt
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-12-29
Updated: 2020-12-29
Packaged: 2021-03-10 23:35:43
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,528
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28415490
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/indigorose50/pseuds/indigorose50
Summary: Dimitri sends Dedue and Hubert, a shaky partnership at best, to gather more information on those who slither in the dark, starting in Lord Arundel's former land. Long pondered questions come forth.(Fulfills the prompt: One Small Kiss, Pulling Away For An Instant, Then Devouring Each Other)
Relationships: Dedue Molinaro/Hubert von Vestra
Comments: 4
Kudos: 22





	Death Wish

**Author's Note:**

> Posted this prompt fill a while ago but when I realized how long it was, I figured it could stand as it's own one-shot! Only made a few minor edits. 
> 
> Plus, I keep musing on it and perhaps posting it here will urge me to continue someday. I actually came up with like a whole fic in my head set before this so that's why it's sort of packed with backstory XD Anyway, enjoy?

The sleet was merciless. If it had been raining, Hubert could just shrug it off and keep marching. If it were snow, at least they could build up a shelter from the wind. But no— it had to be sleeting in former Arundel territory. “I would rather be dead,” Hubert said to his companion, wrapping his sodden cloak tighter around himself.

“I know,” Dedue answered casually.

Three months ago, after the battle of Enbarr, Hubert’s constant instance that he should be dead was said with conviction; usually with blood dripping from his mouth or weakly shuffling back into the corner of his cell. But Dedue had merely acknowledged his wish and tended to his wounds anyway. Now the call and response was more automatic than anything else 

Hubert had been unaware as to why King Dimitri had ordered him kept alive, and downright confused that Dedue should be the one to personally make sure his body healed correctly. But then the two had been given this mission— investigate the people Hubert had titled those who slither in the dark, starting with the home of the man in charge. Hubert had the most knowledge about the group and Dedue had Dimitri’s trust. Regardless if they made a good team, they were both uniquely suited for this quest.

The estate Lord Arundel had spent little time in had yielded few results, and so the pair now trudged through frozen hillsides and unused roads of the territory to find any indication of slither’s people or their base.

So far, all it did was make Hubert long for his small cell in Fhirdiad. Or death. 

Wordlessly, Dedue nudged him and pointed to the silhouette of a barn in the distance. Hubert redirected his course. All these months with Dedue had shown him the man saw no need to speak if he did not wish to. He didn’t try to make inane conversation, like a few other Lions Hubert had been forced to deal with during his recovery; or make threats, like a certain Kingdom duke. In fact if Hubert had felt any contentment at all during these three months, it had been in Dedue’s quiet company.

The barn was empty of any livestock. Likewise the home nearby was missing a roof and long abandoned. Dedue considered the two before dropping his pack in the far corner of the barn. Though still cold as dusk fell, at least they were free from the sleet. Hubert changed into his spare set of clothes, which were only slightly damp from the hike as opposed to actively dripping, and listened as Dedue made a fire out of the rotten beams and hay. 

When he turned, it was to find Dedue staring. “Yes?” Hubert prompted. 

Dedue looked away, stoking the meager flames. “You have healed well. I was worried about the wound on your lower back today, but it’s healing nicely.”

Of course. Dedue was very familiar with Hubert’s body at this point. Even if others were called upon to heal Hubert with their magic, Dedue had remained ever present. All the things Hubert had done during the war and here was the right hand to King Dimitri,  _ worried _ about him. Never mind that Dedue’s axe was the cause of the aforementioned wound. “I feel fine.”

“You’re shivering.”

A true but unwelcome observation. “Then hurry up with that fire.”

“It will take some time before it is warm.” Dedue pat the ground beside him.

Hubert hesitated. The fire would be just as warm, or not warm, if he sat across from Dedue instead. On the outset of this mission, Dedue had warned Hubert against double crossing him, and by extension Dimitri. Otherwise he had never acted aggressive toward Hubert— even at the start of his recovery when Hubert had flung half powered spells at anyone who came close. He knew Dedue would not use force if Hubert ignored the offer.

Nonetheless, Hubert took the spot at Dedue’s side. Dedue had removed his armor and the clothes underneath were mostly dry. Setting down the sickle handle he had been using to prod at the fire, Dedue unwound the trademark scarf from his neck and placed it around Hubert’s instead. Having spent the first month rebuking Dedue’s care, Hubert knew better than to argue. He merely tugged the scarf tighter and hunched towards the flames.

Dedue leaned back against a support beam. “Where do we go from here? Back to the estate?”

“I’m sure the documents and maps there hold more promise than ambling around, but we should take the long way back. Just to be diligent.” Hubert debated taking his boots off. His feet might grow colder but at least his boots could dry by the fire. It was likely his soaked feet that were the cause of his ever-present trembling. 

Hubert jumped when a hand landed on his shoulder and gently pulled him backward. Dedue guided Hubert against his side, draping an arm over him. “That’s–” Hubert began, but stopped when he felt how warm Dedue was. The arm holding him gently and the body it belonged to were far warmer than the fledgling fire before them. Hubert had lost his pride somewhere between Enbarr and Dedue’s methodical care and so he allowed himself to recline into that warmth. 

They were silent as they watched the flames eat the hay and char the wood. Dedue’s thumb began to rub comfortingly against Hubert’s arm as if it were the most natural thing in the world. It didn’t feel strange, to be fair; Dedue’s hands had been on Hubert enough for the touch to be more familiar than aberrant. Though the shivering had long subsided, neither moved. Darkness took the sky properly and left the two in alone in a puddle of flickering light in a drafty barn. 

“I tried to kill Dimitri,” Hubert stated quietly. Dedue did not reply or move. “And yet here we are. Here  _ you _ are, with me.”

“What are you asking?” Dedue’s voice was just as quiet. Hubert turned to look into emerald eyes, vaguely aware that Dedue’s thumb had begun trailing over the Sagittae scar near his elbow. It was not visible through Hubert’s jacket, but they both knew it was there— Dedue had applied an herbal concoction to the injury himself with that same hand.

“I’m asking you why.”

Dedue picked up the sickle hilt and stoked a few embers free, presumably gathering his thoughts. Only when he placed it down again did he speak. “When His Highness only wanted Edelgard’s head, I followed him. When he turned to free the Kingdom, I followed him. I would follow him anywhere for any goal without reservation. He has asked me not to give my life for his, but I would.” 

He looked down at Hubert. “You know what this loyalty is like. You followed Edelgard into war, into a losing battle in the capital, and you did it with everything you are. I can respect that. Others might call it obsessive or blind obedience. But I’ve always admired you for it. Perhaps if things had not gone as they did, we could have worked in tandem for our lords.” 

Hubert tilted his chin up, cheek against Dedue’s shoulder. “You dragged me back from the brink of death because you admire me?”

The arm around him tightened. “Because in your position, I would have wished for death too. Because I understand you. And I think you understand me.”

“Yes,” Hubert found himself saying without hesitation. “I believe I do.”

Dedue’s expression softened at the admission. “I know the effect losing Ed-”

But Hubert couldn’t stand to hear her name again. Every utterance was a strike no matter the context, and Hubert leaned up to kiss Dedue and stop the name falling from him once more.

They both tensed. Quick as it was, the kiss seemed to have shocked them both. The fire cracked but neither moved. Then Dedue bent down and initiated another, deeper kiss. 

Reserved as he often was, Hubert had seen Dedue fight. Had seen the passion the man held back. And now Hubert willingly let himself fall victim to it. Tongue and teeth clashed as Hubert cupped his cheek and Dedue’s other arm came up to hold him closer. Their mouths moved together in a frenzy, the wet, needy noises between them contrasting with the crackle of the fire. 

It all came to a halt when Hubert let out a gasp that had nothing to do with pleasure. He had tried to twist in Dedue’s grip to face him fully and ended up aggravating his still-tender ribs. Both were panting as they drew apart. Dedue’s hand immediately slipped down to his side to caress the wound, brows knit with worry. Hubert shook his head. “I’m fine. We should eat.” He abruptly untangled himself from Dedue’s warmth and headed over to their packs to get the rations.

He felt Dedue’s eyes on him the whole time, and as Hubert bent to open his pack, he rubbed the fabric of the scarf between his fingers thoughtfully. 

That night was the first in three months that Hubert did not beg the gods for death.


End file.
